How Nail Polish started it all!

In the interests of full disclosure, I feel it is my responsibility to let you all know how it started. TGTT suggests I run good, so I think I need to quit denying that claim and let everyone in on a little secret. I started running good in 2002, and it really hasn't ended since then.

Let me set the scene. I purchased a home in Southern Indiana during the summer of 2001. I purchased the home from a family that owned a carpet business. So, suffice it say that the carpet/flooring in this joint was no less than top of the line. Ok, I'm probably like you, who gives a shit about top of the line carpet. Well, after I finish this post you'll know why it matters. The home is a very average 3 bed brick ranch, nothing special, but for me and my family I thought it was fantastic, but actually a bit on the expensive side at $129,000. So, after working out a deal with the owner on the down low, cutting out the realtor and the absurd 7% listing fee, we settled on a reasonable $113,000.

The family room had a plush aqua green carpet surrounded by parkay flooring around the permiter of the room. I like the carpet and the parkay flooring, but my wife not so much. Ok, I realize I'm not runnig great yet, but I'm getting there so be patient. One night my wife is sitting on the couch in the family room getting ready to paint her nails. She begins to actively tap the nail polish bottle into the palm of her hand which as I understand it is common practice to ensure that the nail polish is mixed well before application. Also, if you didn't know, nail polish bottles generally have a metal ball (bearing) that is commonly inserted into the bottle, which I can only think is for the purpose of helping to mix the nail polish during this pre-application ritual of popping the nail polish bottle into one's palm before application. I am really not sure how many times I heard the flesh of my wife's palm collide with the glass nail polish bottle before I realized we had a problem. Or was it? The nail polish had spewed everywhere after the bottle broke in my wife's plam. No significant cut or injury, other than the outrageously pink highlights my wife now dawned. The nail polish generously applied itself to the carpet, couch, my wife's hair, nightgown and expensive breatfeeding bra.

After ensuring that the rather minimal skin abrasion on my wife's hand was not life threatening, I was able to digest to the impact of this accident. The carpet was ruined, the couch was ruined (according to my wife--but I could still be using it today if necessary), my wife had a little paint in her hair but all in all not that big of deal.....until! My wife decides that


Is responsible for this incident. I was confused, I mean I didn't understand at all what that meant. My wife then suggests that she would be contacting Sally Hansen to inquire about them covering the expenses related to the damaged carpet, couch, etc. My response: OK. I still didn't even understand what this meant. How could the nail polish company be responsible for this? My wife then explained that it was a result of them selling a defective nail polish bottle. She further helped me understand that she had never had this happen before so someone was at fault and should pay. I paid it little attention, but she began taking pictures of the affected areas, along with bagging up the broken nail polish bottle. She contacted Sally Hansen and received a response. She was instructed to fill out a report and submit her estimates of the damage for the insurance company. What?????????? You are shitting me right? Nope, quite serious.

This is where I think it gets interesting. I go to the prior home owners' business and request an estimate for the carpet, a section of about 18 X18, and the estimate is for like $1,800. Are you kidding me, this is unreal, carpet doesn't really cost this much, but apparently they had the good stuff in their house. Then the estimate for the nursing bra, couch, nightgown, and hair products for removal of the paint from my wife's hair. So, we get it all together and submit a several thousand dollar claim to Sally Hansen. Again, I start to fall back into my previous line of thinking: This is unreal, nobody pays for this. Well, wrong I am. Sallie Hansen cuts a check for the full amount.

So, now you know 'How Nail Polish started it all!'